We don’t see the world as it is, we see the world as we are. — Anaïs Nin
"For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he." — Proverbs 23:7
Yesterday was a sad day.
tWitch, a much loved man, died by suicide. A man who was hugely talented, loved, respected. We are all shocked and stunned. I don’t know the thought processes and pain that lead him to that decision but my heart aches for his loved ones, who must now struggle with his pain, and all the what-ifs. My heart is heavy, wondering how he must have felt to make that decision.
It makes me think about how important it is for us to REACH OUT when we’re struggling! When life is grim and we’re challenged. Because other people may not understand our struggles, or we understand theirs.
It's ok to not be ok, but don't suffer in silence. Everything is solve-able, resolvable, or manageable. Not neccesarily easy, but there is only one choice that can't be changed. And as we navigate the hard stuff we grow as a human being.
If only we could see ourselves as our loved ones see us. As our friends see us. Or as our colleagues see us…
Life is not perfect, we are not perfect. Sometimes we need someone else’s wisdom, someone else’s perspective to see a way through a dark moment. Someone else to help us see light at the end of that tunnel. So REACH OUT!
It reminds me of my parents’ endless words, especially in my teenage years — this too will pass. The sun will come up in the morning. Or, in my time in personal development, words like “Let it go”.
Where does our language about ourselves come from? Those voices in our head - that inner critic. We all have it. Are they our own words or words we heard from someone else?
Are they uplifting, positive and grounded in self-love, or negative and dark? Are we focusing on our strengths or our weaknesses? Our triumphs or perceived failures?
Are we making the good stuff BIG and the bad stuff small, or the opposite?
Does this sound familiar?
I am [fill in the blank]
I am depressed
I am angry
I am overwhelmed
I am struggling
I am frustrated
I am in a dark place
I am useless
I am humiliated
I am never going to forgive myself/someone else
I am letting everyone down
I am a loser…
If so, PLEASE STOP! This is not who you are really.
Whatever you said after “I am” is your current truth, your current identity. It’s just a thought, a pattern, and you can change it.
Do you know that if you change what you say, you can start to change your beliefs?
That if you change what you say about yourself, you can change your beliefs about yourself?
And not just your beliefs about yourself, but about the world around you.
Because as Anais Nin says, we don’t see the world as it really is, but as we see ourselves.
So again where did our internal dialogue come from? What’s your answer? A parent, a teacher, a friend, social media, self judgement? Does it support us or put us down?
We are just our current habits — even our language habits. Our words create energy. Our words create emotions, and, you can change them.
Please know — you can start to choose differently. You can say amazing things to yourself, and start to feel amazing things about yourself. You have to do it over and over — you have to do the work — but why not? Why not feel great?
Again, on this day, if you’re struggling, REACH OUT!
Everyone has struggles, not just you. Other people have experienced what you’re going through. Some have learned the skills and tools to move through life’s challenges easier. You can learn from them and do the same.
You’re important, and there are answers to life’s challenges everywhere. You may just need help to see them, like everyone else!
YOU matter! Every mistake is a chance to learn. Every woumd can become a gift if you let it. Everything is forgivable under the right circumstances. AND YOU do have and add value in this world.
Your thoughts, and the way you talk to yourself and to other people, create your biochemistry. Choose wisely and you’ll feel better.
Life is experienced through our FOCUS, and the meaning we give to life’s events. Become your own best friend. Talk to yourself the same way you’d talk to a friend in need — and watch your life change for the better.
I am a work in progress.
I am someone who gets back up when I fall down.
I don’t fail, I learn.
I am happy.
I am positive.
I matter.
I know sometimes I need help.
I forgive myself, and others.
I will find a way through this.
I am needed.
I am committed.
I got this!
REACH OUT!